Lacking by the elegance and refinement of sushi, free of the “good recipes” of tapas, and void of the cachet of nouvelle-cuisine, Wushi is distinguished from other small-plate traditions by placing priority on the question “what do I want to put in my mouth” rather than the question “what should I put in my mouth”.

Accommodating all traditions, ingredients, and opinions of what is edible, Wushi is founded 4 Basic principles which are applied to a system of classification for maximum tastiness results.

The Principles of Wushi

  1. Take food you like
  2. Put it on top of, or inside, other food you like
  3. If possible, include something that could make it taste weird, but ends up making it taste awesome.
  4. Make it bite-sized, for optimal sharing and ballistics.

The System of Wushi

Food and food-like items are divided into the following categories

  • Headliner
  • Ballast
  • Pizzazz
  • The Snug
  • The Plank
  • The Smooth
  • The Sauce
  • Sprinkles

Headliner

Substantial, flavorful items

Sushi equivalent

fish

Basic

Wild mushrooms, bacon, Marinated tofu

Advanced

mini-pizzas, snails, cactus

Adventurous

bar soap


Ballast

Substantial but blander than the Headliner.

Sushi equivalent

Rice

Basic

Rice, potatoes

Advanced

Brioche, marshmallows

Adventurous

Matchbox cars


Pizzazz

Spicy, tangy, or ummami-ful stuff, often dipped-in or added-on

Sushi equivalent

wasabi, pickled ginger, etc.

Basic

Mustard, hot peppers, lemon, horseradish, olives

Advanced

balsamic vinegar, dried cherries, whisky

Adventurous

bleach


The Snug

Sheet-food or pocket-food that you wrap around the other stuff

Sushi equivalent

Nigiri

Basic

Tortillas, chard leaves, crepes

Advanced

Bean paste, bubblegum, grape leaves

Adventurous

Hairnets


The Plank

Flat and sturdy food onto which you can pile everything else

Sushi equivalent

?

Basic

Crackers, chips

Advanced

Pop-tarts, hard cheese

Adventurous

cardboard


The Smooth

Fat = flavor

Sushi equivalent

Cream cheese*, creamy scallop, avocado

Basic

goat cheese, silken tofu, yogurt

Advanced

apple butter, spray cheese, lard

Adventurous

wheat paste


Sprinkles

Extra-tasty bits to sprinkle on top

Sushi equivalent

Roe, onion slices

Basic

crushed nuts, actual sprinkles, salt, blue cheese crumbles

Advanced

Brewer’s yeast, pop-rocks

Adventurous

Glitter


The Sauce

Self-explanatory. Infinite possibilities.